I was standing in a department store in Tyson's corner today, looking at the selection of ties, when I noticed something amazing.
Ed Hardy makes ties!
Now for those of you who aren't aware of this new fashion trend, Ed Hardy is a brand which markets "vintage tattoo" inspired clothing and accessories. Imagine, all the tackiness of visible tattoos, now screen printed onto your favorite T-shirt or hooded sweatshirt! Many of the clothes available even have sequins or rhinestones as accents. Be the envy of your friends by wearing this bullshit!
Now the designs center on things like skulls and roses, with weighty terms like "love" and "death" written prominently on the graphics. Now, when my grandfather's navy buddies were getting that inked into their flesh, it was innovative. The permanence of the artwork justified its subject, as arguably "love" should be lasting, and death is anything but temporary. These are weighty concepts with deep philosophical connotations. When you wear a screen print of them on a T-shirt, you look like an ass. An ass with a skull on his shirt.
Ed Hardy markets a cologne, which I assume, in the vein of vintage tatoo-ery, smells like the bowels of a Word War II battleship stationed in the pacific. Eau de man-sweat and diesel, mmm.
But the ties are what really got me. Not only are they horrifically ugly, but the casual nature of tattoos conflicts directly with the purpose of a tie, which is to dress up a bit. These ties make not a lick of sense.
So in conclusion: Christian Audigier please stop. Come on. I said please.
1 comment:
When it comes to fashionable culture, people aren't really aware of the fact that what they are wearing looks beat. In modern society identity is always something that comes up and as a result of the cyclical nature of fashion and media trends. Sure skulls and love and all of that other shit look cool because at the time of its conception it was "modern". Self-referencing and originality are a key asset of modernism. Now, all of those new ideas of the past have been played out by a bunch of chumps who started ed harvey.
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